TOP CHEF

Goodtime Inc. makes the end of summer a little more bareable.

The end of summer is always bittersweet, but the Goodtime Calendar of 1963 softens the blow with another image from the mysterious L.W., this one of a barbecuing beauty tending some hot meat. Goodtime’s weekly quips often include insights from unexpected sources. Just last week it was Fred Flintstone. This time it’s none other than Albert Einstein. His inclusion actually makes sense, since he is well known for a quote about a hot stove and a pretty girl. Well, not a quote, really. It was the abstract from a paper he wrote for the Journal of Exothermic Science and Technology in 1938. If you don’t know it, in its full, original form, it goes like this: “When a man sits with a pretty girl for an hour, it seems like a minute. But let him sit on a hot stove for a minute and it’s longer than any hour. That’s relativity.” His and others’ insights below:

Aug 25: “The strangest dog is the hot dog—it always feeds the hand that bites it,”—Sam Cowling

Aug 26: Women: The sex that believes that if you charge it, it’s not spending.

Aug 27: “Unless a woman can read a guy like a book he’ll never make her best fella list.”—Henry Morgan

Aug 28: The trouble with being faithful is that you got to have a chance to prove it.

Aug 29: Women often do not understand opinions but seldom mistake acts.

Aug 30: “Sometimes one pays most for the things one gets for nothing.”—Albert Einstein

Aug 31: It’s forbidden fruit that’s responsible for many a bad jam.

Goodtime Weekly Calendar, Sam Cowling, Henry Morgan, Albert Einstein, nudity

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HISTORY REWIND

The headlines that mattered yesteryear.

September 19

1934—Arrest Made in Lindbergh Baby Case

Bruno Hauptmann is arrested for the kidnap and murder of Charles Lindbergh Jr., son of the famous American aviator. The infant child had been abducted from the Lindbergh home in March 1932, and found decomposed two months later in the woods nearby. He had suffered a fatal skull fracture. Hauptmann was tried, convicted, sentenced to death, and finally executed by electric chair in April 1936. He proclaimed his innocence to the end

September 18

1919—Pollard Breaks the Color Barrier

Fritz Pollard becomes the first African-American to play professional football for a major team, the Akron Pros. Though Pollard is forgotten today, famed sportswriter Walter Camp ranked him as “one of the greatest runners these eyes have ever seen.” In another barrier-breaking historical achievement, Pollard later became the co-head coach of the Pros, while still maintaining his roster position as running back.

September 18

1932—Entwistle Leaps from Hollywood Sign

Actress Peg Entwistle commits suicide by jumping from the letter “H” in the Hollywood sign. Her body lay in the ravine below for two days, until it was found by a detective and two radio car officers. She remained unidentified until her uncle connected the description and the initials “P.E.” on the suicide note in the newspapers with his niece’s two-day absence.

September 17

1908—First Airplane Fatality Occurs

The plane built by Wilbur and Orville Wright, The Wright Flyer, crashes with Lieutenant Thomas Selfridge aboard as a passenger. The accident kills Selfridge, and he becomes the first airplane fatality in history.

September 17

1983—First Black Miss America Crowned

Vanessa Williams becomes the first African American Miss America. She later loses her crown when lesbian-themed nude photographs of her are published by Penthouse magazine.

September 16

1920—Terrorists Bomb Wall Street

At 12:01 p.m. a bomb loaded into a horse-drawn wagon explodes in front of the J.P.Morgan building in New York City. 38 people are killed and 400 injured. Italian anarchists are thought to be the perpetrators, but after years of investigation no one is ever brought to justice.