Vintage Pulp

May 5 2019

INTO THE GRETA UNKNOWN

Three dimensions would have been plenty. Two probably would have been fine also.

The psychedelic sexploitation flick Four Dimensions of Greta, for which you see a Japanese promo poster above, was originally released in the UK in 1972, and opened in Japan today in 1973. Can you believe this low budget comedy was the first British film to be shown in 3-D? It starred future General Hospital hunk Tristan Rogers, Karen Boyes, Minah Bird, Felicity Devonshire, and Swedish dish Leena Skoog in the story of a journalist who plans to do an article on au pairs, but somehow ends up trying to locate a missing person—the titular Greta Gruber, played by Skoog.

So, why are there four dimensions in the title of this 3-D movie? Well, Greta is remembered by four acquaintances, each of whom reveals a different aspect of her personality. Rogers wanders from trippy disco to trippy strip club to trippy coffeehouse and finally learns that she’s been kidnapped and imprisoned on a houseboat. It’s silly, but if you’re old enough to remember Rogers as Robert Scorpio on GH, it may be fun to see him go softcore. But be forewarned—Einstein proved the fourth dimension is time, and you’ll never get back what you lose watching this one.

Japan, Sweden, Four Dimensions of Greta, Karen Boyes, Leena Skoog, Minah Bird, Felicity Devonshire, Tristan Rogers, poster art, cinema, nudity, movie review

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HISTORY REWIND

The headlines that mattered yesteryear.

September 19

1934—Arrest Made in Lindbergh Baby Case

Bruno Hauptmann is arrested for the kidnap and murder of Charles Lindbergh Jr., son of the famous American aviator. The infant child had been abducted from the Lindbergh home in March 1932, and found decomposed two months later in the woods nearby. He had suffered a fatal skull fracture. Hauptmann was tried, convicted, sentenced to death, and finally executed by electric chair in April 1936. He proclaimed his innocence to the end

September 18

1919—Pollard Breaks the Color Barrier

Fritz Pollard becomes the first African-American to play professional football for a major team, the Akron Pros. Though Pollard is forgotten today, famed sportswriter Walter Camp ranked him as “one of the greatest runners these eyes have ever seen.” In another barrier-breaking historical achievement, Pollard later became the co-head coach of the Pros, while still maintaining his roster position as running back.

September 18

1932—Entwistle Leaps from Hollywood Sign

Actress Peg Entwistle commits suicide by jumping from the letter “H” in the Hollywood sign. Her body lay in the ravine below for two days, until it was found by a detective and two radio car officers. She remained unidentified until her uncle connected the description and the initials “P.E.” on the suicide note in the newspapers with his niece’s two-day absence.

September 17

1908—First Airplane Fatality Occurs

The plane built by Wilbur and Orville Wright, The Wright Flyer, crashes with Lieutenant Thomas Selfridge aboard as a passenger. The accident kills Selfridge, and he becomes the first airplane fatality in history.

September 17

1983—First Black Miss America Crowned

Vanessa Williams becomes the first African American Miss America. She later loses her crown when lesbian-themed nude photographs of her are published by Penthouse magazine.

September 16

1920—Terrorists Bomb Wall Street

At 12:01 p.m. a bomb loaded into a horse-drawn wagon explodes in front of the J.P.Morgan building in New York City. 38 people are killed and 400 injured. Italian anarchists are thought to be the perpetrators, but after years of investigation no one is ever brought to justice.