Vintage Pulp

May 5 2019

INTO THE GRETA UNKNOWN

Three dimensions would have been plenty. Two probably would have been fine also.

The psychedelic sexploitation flick Four Dimensions of Greta, for which you see a Japanese promo poster above, was originally released in the UK in 1972, and opened in Japan today in 1973. Can you believe this low budget comedy was the first British film to be shown in 3-D? It starred future General Hospital hunk Tristan Rogers, Karen Boyes, Minah Bird, Felicity Devonshire, and Swedish dish Leena Skoog in the story of a journalist who plans to do an article on au pairs, but somehow ends up trying to locate a missing person—the titular Greta Gruber, played by Skoog.

So, why are there four dimensions in the title of this 3-D movie? Well, Greta is remembered by four acquaintances, each of whom reveals a different aspect of her personality. Rogers wanders from trippy disco to trippy strip club to trippy coffeehouse and finally learns that she’s been kidnapped and imprisoned on a houseboat. It’s silly, but if you’re old enough to remember Rogers as Robert Scorpio on GH, it may be fun to see him go softcore. But be forewarned—Einstein proved the fourth dimension is time, and you’ll never get back what you lose watching this one.

Japan, Sweden, Four Dimensions of Greta, Karen Boyes, Leena Skoog, Minah Bird, Felicity Devonshire, Tristan Rogers, poster art, cinema, nudity, movie review

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HISTORY REWIND

The headlines that mattered yesteryear.

October 10

1971—London Bridge Goes Up

After being sold, dismantled and moved to the United States, London Bridge reopens in the resort town of Lake Havasu City, Arizona.

October 10

1975—Burton and Taylor Marry Again

British actor Richard Burton and American screen star Elizabeth Taylor secretly remarry sixteen months after their divorce, then jet away to a second honeymoon in Chobe Game Park in Botswana.

October 9

1967—ChÃ© Executed in Bolivia

A day after being captured, Marxist revolutionary Ernesto “Che” Guevara is executed in Bolivia. In an attempt to make it appear as though he had been killed resisting Bolivian troops, the executioner shoots Guevara with a machine gun, wounding him nine times in the legs, arm, shoulder, throat, and chest.

October 8

1918—Sgt. York Becomes a Hero

During World War I, in the Argonne Forest in France, America Corporal Alvin C. York leads an attack on a German machine gun nest that kills 25 and captures 132. He is a corporal during the event, but is promoted to sergeant as a result. He also earns Medal of Honor from the U.S., the Croix de Guerre from the French Republic, and the Croce di Guerra from Italy and Montenegro. Stateside, he is celebrated as a hero, and Hollywood even makes a movie entitled Sergeant York, starring Gary Cooper.

October 8

1956—Larsen Pitches Perfect Game

The New York Yankees’ Don Larsen pitches a perfect game in the World Series against hated rivals the Brooklyn Dodgers. It is the only perfect game in World Series history, as well as the only no-hitter.

October 7

1959—Dark Side of Moon Revealed

The Soviet space probe Luna 3 transmits the first photographs of the far side of the moon. The photos generate great interest, and scientists are surprised to see mountainous terrain, very different from the near side, and only two seas, which the Soviets name Mare Moscovrae (Sea of Moscow) and Mare Desiderii (Sea of Desire).