There hasn’t been much real-world pulp of late, but here’s an interesting item: yesterday Juan-Carlos Cruz—once the host of a Food Network weight loss show entitled “Calorie Commando” and the author of a low calorie cookbook—pleaded not guilty to attempting to hire three Los Angeles area homeless men to kill his wife of twenty years. Cruz was arrested Thursday after police confirmed the plot by recording a meeting between Cruz and the would-be killers at a Santa Monica dog park. The men told officers that Cruz offered them $1,000 if they would ambush his wife and cut her throat. When one of them objected to that as too public a murder, Cruz allegedly offered the use of an empty apartment, even demonstrating how to avoid video monitors while slipping into the building. He also allegedly supplied box cutters, gloves, a cell phone for keeping in contact, and a down payment consisting of the halves of ten $100 bills. As of right now the motive for the plot is unclear. If convicted, Cruz faces life behind bars, where he’ll find an entirely new recipe for keeping his weight down—heaping spoonfuls of unidentifiable prison slop.
