BLAGOJEVICH UPDATE:

This guy is not leaving anytime soon.

Rod Blagojevich is hanging onto his governorship the way a cat hangs onto the carpet when you try to put it in a kitty caddie. Everyone in the world knows Blag is crooked as elbow macaroni, but he ain’t giving up that sweet free ride known as politics without a fight. We’ve seen politicians caught before, but this guy is more caught than usual. Seriously, the plausible deniability signpost disappeared in his rearview mirror years ago. We keep picturing undercover FBI techs spewing coffee on each other, they’re laughing so hard listening to Rod work it like a three-card monte dealer: “Step right up folks and find the Senate seat. Where could it be? Lay down a little cashola for a chance to play the game.” And now, after being so caught Webster’s is already adding a new entry—caught 1) Rod Blagojevich—he now refuses to resign. Two observations: first, the fucking chutzpah of this guy; second, the fucking pulp of this guy.

Chicago, Rod Blagojevich

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HISTORY REWIND

The headlines that mattered yesteryear.

September 6

1901—McKinley Fatally Shot

Polish-born anarchist Leon Czolgosz shoots and fatally wounds U.S. President William McKinley at the Pan-American Exposition in Buffalo, New York. McKinley dies September 12, and Czolgosz is later executed.

September 5

1939—U.S. Declares Neutrality in WW II

The Neutrality Acts, which had been passed in the 1930s when the United States considered foreign conflicts undesirable, prompts the nation to declare neutrality in World War II. The policy ended with the Lend-Lease Act of March 1941, which allowed the U.S. to sell, lend or give war materials to allied nations.

September 5

1972—Munich Massacre

During the 1972 Summer Olympics in Munich, West Germany, a paramilitary group calling itself Black September takes members of the Israeli olympic team hostage. Eventually the group, which represents the first glimpse of terrorists for most people in the Western world, kill eleven of the hostages along with one West German police officer during a rescue attempt by West German police that devolves into a firefight. Five of the eight members of Black September are also killed.

September 4

1957—U.S. National Guard Used Against Students

The governor of Arkansas, Orval Faubus, mobilizes the National Guard to prevent nine African-American students known as the Little Rock Nine from enrolling in high school in Little Rock, Arkansas.

September 3

1941—Auschwitz Begins Gassing Prisoners

Auschwitz-Birkenau, the largest of Nazi Germany’s concentration camps, becomes an extermination camp when it begins using poison gas to kill prisoners en masse. The camp commandant, Rudolf HÃ¶ss, later testifies at the Nuremberg Trials that he believes perhaps 3 million people died at Auschwitz, but the Auschwitz-Birkenau State Museum revises the figure to about 1 million.