WALK, THIS WAY

I’ll be so famous people will completely forget about that other Marilyn. Just wait and see.

When you hear the phrase “Marilyn Walk” you probably associate it with Marilyn Monroe’s distinctive sashay. That’s a fine image, but if your name happens literally to be Marilyn Walk then that means you went down in Hollywood history unremembered. We like to imagine Walk dreaming of catching her first big break and seeing an article about herself entitled “Walk of Fame.” It doesn’t seem as if that happened, but this shot by renowned lensman Bruno Bernard, aka Bernard of Hollywood, bestows a sort of fame upon Walk all by itself by making her image a rare collectible. It was probably made during the early 1950s. And just in case you think we’re making up her name, the reverse of the photo appears below.

Update: We now think this is Playboy model Marilyn Waltz. The look is right, the time is right, and the name is close. She was probably trying out a pseudonym to dissociate herself from her centerfold appearances, which spanned February 1954 to April 1955. Or this shot predated those appearances and she used a new name for her nude modeling. Either way, we’re 95% on her identity.

Aww, we can’t believe how big she’s gotten.

A naked woman in a baby crib? From our 2012 perspective we think the whole idea is a bit deviant, but in 1963 presumably this photo from Bruno Bernard, aka Bernard of Hollywood, was totally innocuous, right? No, we didn’t think so either. Nude photography runs the gamut. Sometimes it depicts women as strong or even domineering, but more often it suggests that the perfect woman is pliant and childlike, so to us at least, going the extra step and putting the model in a crib is just a bit too overt for good taste. But we were not even zygotes in 1963 so we’re not trying to judge. The photo is pretty, and that’s really all we can say. The week’s quips, with observations from poet Carl Sandburg and actor Vincent Price, are below.

Dec 8: “A baby is God’s opinion that the world should go on.”—Carl Sandburg

Dec 9: “A lot of girls who can dish it out can’t cook it.”—Vincent Price

Dec 10: Behind every successful man there’s a woman nagging him he’s not so hot.

Dec 11: “Solo: A loud passage played by the orchestra leader’s brother-in-law.”—John Doremus

Dec 12: “Every time my mother-in-law comes to sleep at our house, I have breakfast in bed. I sleep in the kitchen.”—Bobby Ramsen

Dec 13: “The modern girl marries for keeps; she keeps on working and keeps house.”—Paul Fogarty

Dec 14: There’s no economy in going to bed early to save candles if the result is twins—Chinese Prov.

When she says jump you ask how high.

Some call it cheesecake, glamour, or even smut, but we prefer to call it preserving the ephemera of history. For instance, this image by the renowned mid-century photographer Bruno Bernard, aka Bernard of Hollywood, did not exist on the internet a moment ago. And now it does. See how that works? So think of us as archivists, and yourselves as researchers. That probably won’t help if someone sees you looking at this image, but hey, it’s worth a try. 

Of late, when reading the Goodtime Weekly quips, we’ve been imagining them delivered as part of a stand-up show—i.e., followed by uproarious laughter. That actually helps a bit. When we obey the two drink minimum that helps even more. Next we’re going to steal a few of these lines and try them out in the real world. After all, the true test of a quip is whether actual living and breathing, flesh and blood humans laugh at it. So we’re going to give some of these a trial run and get back to you. Stay tuned.

Oct 13: Mother Nature still blushes before disrobing.

Oct 14: “Sometimes a man pulls the wool over his wife’s eyes with the wrong yarn.”—Mitch Miller

Oct 15: “Have you heard of an elephant that went on a diet? Now he’s eating like a horse.”—Peggie Castle

Oct 16: “The ten best years of a woman’s life are between her 25th and 26th birthday.”—Jerry Lester

Oct 17: “Overheard at a restaurant: ‘She promised to love, honor, and obey. Now I’d settle for only one.’”—Irv Kupcinet

Oct 18: “Every husband knows the best time to wash the dishes is right after his wife tells him.”—Paul Gibson

Oct 19: “Husbands are like furnaces. You have to watch them or they’ll go out.”—Sam Cowling

Hmm, maybe I should change this wallpaper.

Some well known photographers have contributed to the Goodtime Weekly Calendar, but the above image is by a true icon—Bruno Bernard, aka Bernard of Hollywood. The German-born Bernard possessed a doctorate in criminal psychology and had no formal photographic training, but after leaving Germany in 1937 was operating his own portrait studio within a year.

His second studio was on Sunset Boulevard, and that’s where he worked for 25 years, along the way creating such iconic images as Marilyn Monroe’s Niagara and River of No Return promos, Lili St. Cyr’s Indian headdress and transparent bathtub shots, and portraits of virtually every star in mid-century Hollywood. The Goodtime Calendar has several other Bernard contributions, and you’ll see those as the year continues.

As a side note, you may be wondering why we’re showing you this second week of July image a week early. It’s because we’re headed off to Sevilla, Spain tomorrow for a week or so, and we won’t be posting during that time. Well, you never know. Probably we won’t. Depends on what we see. But anyway, we didn’t want our vacation to interrupt our Goodtime Weekly series, so you get this page a week early. You also get the quips a week early:

July 7: “When a man opens the car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.”—Larry Attebery

July 8: When a pensive little thing gets married, she often becomes an expensive little thing.

July 9: “A psychiatrist is a man who doesn’t have to worry so long as other people do.”—Pat Buttram

July 10: “A Hollywood guy changes his name once, a dollar bill once in a while, and his girl once she gets wise.”—Joe Hamilton

July 11: A man is incomplete until he marries—then he’s really finished.

July 12: “Science is dandy, but what makes a world’s fair is sex and cotton candy.”—Gracie Hansen

July 13: Small town: a place where there’s no recreation for single folks once the sun goes down.

Update: Turns out the model is named Terry Higgins. We just discovered this in June 2015, but better late than never. At least you know we’re always updating and refining the information on our site.

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HISTORY REWIND

The headlines that mattered yesteryear.

1978—Sid Vicious Arrested for Murder

Sex Pistols bassist Sid Vicious is arrested on suspicion of murder after the body of his girlfriend Nancy Spungen is found in their room at New York City’s Chelsea Hotel. Vicious and Spungen had a famously stormy relationship, but Vicious proclaims he is innocent. He is released on bail and dies of a heroin overdose before a trial takes place.

1979—Adams Publishes First Hitchhiker's Book

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the first of five books in a series, is published by Douglas Adams. The novels follow on the heels of the tremendously successful British television series of the same name.

1976—China Coup Thwarted

The new head of the Chinese Communist Party, Hua Goufeng, snuffs out a coup led by Chairman Mao’s widow Jiang Qing and three other party members. They become known as the Gang of Four, and are tried, found guilty of treason, and receive death sentences that are later commuted to lengthy prison terms.

1987—Loch Ness Expedition Ends

A sonar exploration of Scotland’s Loch Ness, called Operation Deepscan, ends after a week without finding evidence that the legendary Loch Ness Monster exists. While the flotilla of boats had picked up three sonar contacts indicating something large in the waters, these are considered to be detections of salmon schools or possibly seals.

1971—London Bridge Goes Up

After being sold, dismantled and moved to the United States, London Bridge reopens in the resort town of Lake Havasu City, Arizona.

1975—Burton and Taylor Marry Again

British actor Richard Burton and American screen star Elizabeth Taylor secretly remarry sixteen months after their divorce, then jet away to a second honeymoon in Chobe Game Park in Botswana.

1967—Che Executed in Bolivia

A day after being captured, Marxist revolutionary Ernesto “Che” Guevara is executed in Bolivia. In an attempt to make it appear as though he had been killed resisting Bolivian troops, the executioner shoots Guevara with a machine gun, wounding him nine times in the legs, arm, shoulder, throat, and chest.

Classic science fiction from James Grazier with uncredited cover art.
Hammond Innes volcano tale features Italian intrigue and Mitchell Hooks cover art.

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