NATURAL BORN CHEATER

I'm sort of a paradox. I'm a terrible wife, but I'm incredible at everything that gets a woman a husband.


Above is a cover for Don Tracy’s novel The Cheat, originally published as Criss-Cross in 1934, with this Lion edition coming in 1956 with Charles Copeland cover art. This is a good book, but if you’re seeking artful prose you might as well keep looking. 1934 was early in the game for hard-boiled fiction. A few authors were doing visionary work but the form was still establishing its parameters. What attracted readers was that these were new types of stories—frank, violent, and centered around hard luck protagonists, ruthless villains, and women who were to varying degrees breathtakingly beautiful, sexually ravenous, and totally amoral.

The Cheat is about a boxer named Johnny Thompson. The Depression has drained the profit from boxing, so for the moment Johnny is an armored car guard, riding shotgun for payroll deliveries. He’s occasionally going out with Anna, who’s far too beautiful for the likes of him and mainly just likes to have money spent on her. Johnny doesn’t have much of that, which means he has no real shot with Anna. He coasts along in financial and romantic limbo until Anna breaks his heart by suddenly marrying a neighborhood slickster named Slim Dundee.

So many of these pulp novels hinge upon sex, but it couldn’t be explicitly stated. Tracy is fairly clear about it here, though. Johnny thinks he’s ugly yet refuses to consort with women he considers to be of inadequate quality, so he’s sexually inexperienced. He isn’t a virgin, but it’s been years since his first couple of sexual encounters. Anna is his unattainbale dream. He’s never even kissed her, but her willingness to associate with him provided his life with hope. He lost that when she married, but she later shocks him by finally offering herself to him, vows be damned. We get a clear sense of what it means to Johnny:

I bit my knuckles thinking about it and how sweet—oh my God—it would be, but I wouldn’t take it. [snip] Every hour was full of pictures of Anna. Anna as I’d seen her and Anna as I’d never seen her, but could if I went there the next night. Anna, naked. Anna, in my arms, looking up at me. I kept seeing her and feeling her body under me and her open mouth on my mouth.

So hot she makes him bite his knuckles. That’s hot. Johnny virtually flogs himself, telling himself not to give in, not to betray Slim, not to accept Anna’s baffling out-of-the-blue offer, but it’s useless of course. He goes, she meets him at the door in a kimono and nothing else, his fuses all blow, and nature takes its course:

I remember sobbing, although I wasn’t really crying, when the first deep contentment began to rub out the ache I’d had in me for so long.

Well, that gets to the point. And it’s a point we’ve been making for years. These guys don’t get into trouble because of mere sex. They get into trouble because of sex as they never imagined it could be—in this case sex that makes him “not really” cry. Yowsa. His reaction has largely to do with finally attaining what he thought he was not good enough to have, in effect validating his entire existence, but there’s no doubt the heights of sheer physical pleasure bring it on too. We picture him drying his wet eyes with a corner of the sheet and telling Anna, “I’m sorry. It’s not you, it’s me.” Needless to say, he’s hooked, and who wouldn’t be?

During subsequent sessions Anna keeps her, ahem, guard up, and Johnny enjoys every moment, despite feelings of guilt for being a backstabber. Then comes the pivotal day when Slim approaches him with an idea to rob the armored car—with Johnny as the inside man. Anna is on board with the plan, so clearly if he refuses she might not let him be her inside man anymore. Where it goes from there we won’t reveal. We’ll only say that The Cheat overcomes its rudimentary feel and provides considerable entertainment, which is the next best thing to actually being well written. And for those who enjoy their crime thrillers with motion and sound, a pretty good movie was made of it in 1949. Chose either or both. You’ll win regardless.
Bank heist goes every which way except the right way.

This year’s Noir City Film Festival opens with the 1949 heist drama Criss Cross. Based on a bestselling novel of the same name by Don Tracy, it’s the story of man played by Burt Lancaster who returns to Los Angeles after some years away to find that his ex-wife Yvonne De Carlo has hooked up with a local gangster. The exes rekindle their flame, but when it looks as if the gangster has caught them in the act Lancaster spontaneously cooks up a story about how he was putting together a plan to rob the armored car service for which he works.

Lancaster’s robbery idea is not only designed to deflect the gangster’s suspicion away from the affair, but to also fund the future he envisions with De Carlo when she and him run away. This scheme, which strains credulity, is probably one of the most obviously terrible ideas in the long, celebrated history of doomed ideas in film noir, but with good direction by Robert Siodmak, who had worked with Lancaster on The Killers, and good acting by all involved, the film concludes on the positive side of the effectiveness ledger. Numerous excellent Los Angeles exteriors, including at Union Station and on now mostly leveled Bunker Hill, make this noir an important time capsule as well, an aspect that increases its appeal. And an excellent musical number by Esy Morales & His Rhumba Band gives the proceedings a further boost. All in all, Criss Cross is a winner.

Young man come play your horn.

The best thing about Trumpet City, in our humble opinion, is the food. That’s probably surprising to hear, because the place is super famous for its music, and the music is great of course, mainly because of the amazing tradition of horn players—duh. But the cuisine of Trumpet City is really a quite underrated element of… Sorry, what? Say again? Strumpet?

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HISTORY REWIND

The headlines that mattered yesteryear.

1937—Carothers Patents Nylon

Wallace H. Carothers, an American chemist, inventor and the leader of organic chemistry at DuPont Corporation, receives a patent for a silk substitute fabric called nylon. Carothers was a depressive who for years carried a cyanide capsule on a watch chain in case he wanted to commit suicide, but his genius helped produce other polymers such as neoprene and polyester. He eventually did take cyanide—not in pill form, but dissolved in lemon juice—resulting in his death in late 1937.

1933—Franklin Roosevelt Survives Assassination Attempt

In Miami, Florida, Giuseppe Zangara attempts to shoot President-elect Franklin D. Roosevelt, but is restrained by a crowd and, in the course of firing five wild shots, hits five people, including Chicago, Illinois Mayor Anton J. Cermak, who dies of his wounds three weeks later. Zangara is quickly tried and sentenced to eighty years in jail for attempted murder, but is later convicted of murder when Cermak dies. Zangara is sentenced to death and executed in Florida’s electric chair.

1929—Seven Men Shot Dead in Chicago

Seven people, six of them gangster rivals of Al Capone’s South Side gang, are machine gunned to death in Chicago, Illinois, in an event that would become known as the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre. Because two of the shooters were dressed as police officers, it was initially thought that police might have been responsible, but an investigation soon proved the killings were gang related. The slaughter exceeded anything yet seen in the United States at that time.

1935—Jury Finds Hauptmann Guilty

A jury in Flemington, New Jersey finds Bruno Hauptmann guilty of the 1932 kidnapping and murder of the Lindbergh baby, the son of Charles Lindbergh. Hauptmann is sentenced to death and executed in 1936. For decades, his widow Anna fights to have his named cleared, claiming that Hauptmann did not commit the crime, and was instead a victim of prosecutorial misconduct, but her claims are ultimately dismissed in 1984 after the U.S. Supreme Court refuses to address the case.

Uncredited cover art for Day Keene’s 1952 novel Wake Up to Murder.
Another uncredited artist produces another beautiful digest cover. This time it's for Norman Bligh's Waterfront Hotel, from Quarter Books.
Above is more artwork from the prolific Alain Gourdon, better known as Aslan, for the 1955 Paul S. Nouvel novel Macadam Sérénade.
Uncredited art for Merle Miller's 1949 political drama The Sure Thing.

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