SPACE RACE

They may look like us but they have an entirely different set of priorities.

In another example of a low budget throwaway movie having brilliant promo art, above is a poster for the Mexican sci-fi flick El planeta de las mujeres invasoras, aka Planet of the Female Invaders, which premiered today in 1966 amidst a wave of similar films with smoking hot female aliens. The genius who created this piece of art is not known. We mean we don’t know. Someone else might. If you’re that special someone, clue us in, would you? We’d like to identify this person and seek out more of their work.

Plotwise, you get what’s advertised. Creatures from the planet Sibila, led by Lorena Velázquez, land their flying saucer in a carnival, disguise it as a ride called Viaje a la Luna, and make off with any unfortunates who wander aboard. This is an extremely random way to select humans, which is why they end up with three gangsters in their midst. This trio has followed someone onto the ship, a boxer they plan to lay low for failing to take a dive in the ring.

Also aboard are Fat Man and Little Boy—not the bombs, but rather cinematic stereotypes meant to inject the film with comic relief and pathetic innocence, respectively. The gangsters are funny too, actually. They keep hitting their noses on doors. This entire group and a couple of randoms are blasted into space while the rubes in the carnival gawp in astonishment. Terror awaits the abductees, as Velázquez and company plan to steal their lungs. Getting good lungs from Mexico is like getting good livers from the Czech Republic. You can make a more informed choice.

But super-advanced, hyper-intelligent beings always overlook flaws in their plans. In addition to not checking regional air quality, Velázquez didn’t confirm that her twin sister (also Velázquez ) was down with the whole cruel program. If the Earthlings are to be saved, it’ll be with help from the inside. Also needing help from the inside was the production, writing, and acting team, but alas, none was forthcoming, and the result was a truly terrible movie. But it’s one you can make funny if you have the improvisational skills. Invite your friends and see if you’re as clever as you think.

The idea of disguising our ship is good in principle, but I seriously doubt we can make it look unsafe enough to be a ride in a Mexican carnival.

Hi, beautiful. What’s your name?

*Zzzzzt!* You’ll never know, lung donor!

Look, here comes an entire group of humans, including those noisy ones I love zapping. But we already have what we need. We can ignore them.

*Zzzzzt!* I said ignore them! Why’d you zap her?

I dunno. I’m starting to enjoy pointless violence. These Earthlings must be rubbing off on me.

Mexico, El planeta de las mujeres invasoras, Planet of the Female Invaders, Lorena Velázquez, Elizabeth Campbell, Maura Monti, poster art, cinema, sci-fi, movie review

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HISTORY REWIND

The headlines that mattered yesteryear.

January 17

1950—The Great Brinks Robbery Occurs

In the U.S., eleven thieves steal more than $2 million from an armored car company’s offices in Boston, Massachusetts. The skillful execution of the crime, with only a bare minimum of clues left at the scene, results in the robbery being billed as “the crime of the century.” Despite this, all the members of the gang are later arrested.

January 17

1977—Gary Gilmore Is Executed

Convicted murderer Gary Gilmore is executed by a firing squad in Utah, ending a ten-year moratorium on Capital punishment in the United States. Gilmore’s story is later turned into a 1979 novel entitled The Executioner’s Song by Norman Mailer, and the book wins the Pulitzer Prize for literature.

January 16

1942—Carole Lombard Dies in Plane Crash

American actress Carole Lombard, who was the highest paid star in Hollywood during the late 1930s, dies in the crash of TWA Flight 3, on which she was flying from Las Vegas to Los Angeles after headlining a war bond rally in support of America’s military efforts. She was thirty-three years old.

January 15

1919—Luxemburg and Liebknecht Are Killed

Rosa Luxemburg and Karl Liebknecht, two of the most prominent socialists in Germany, are tortured and murdered by the Freikorps. Freikorps was a term applied to various paramilitary organizations that sprang up around Germany as soldiers returned in defeat from World War I. Members of these groups would later become prominent members of the SS.

January 14

1967—Summer of Love Begins

The Human Be-In takes place in San Francisco’s Golden Gate Park with between 20,000 to 30,000 people in attendance, their purpose being to promote their ideals of personal empowerment, cultural and political decentralization, communal living, ecological preservation, and higher consciousness. The event is considered the beginning of the famed counterculture Summer of Love.