Vintage Pulp

October 29 2021

WARDEN OF THE STATE

Whether you call her Ilsa, Greta, or Wanda, she's a Thorne in everyone's sides.

Above is a Japanese poster for Ilsa, the Wicked Warden. We’ve already shown you Japanese posters for what we assumed was the complete Ilsa trilogy of torturesploitation flicks starring Dyanne Thorne, but when we saw this one we got a little confused. This was originally released in West Germany in January 1977—before the third official Ilsa film. It was not originally titled Ilsa the Wicked Warden, but Greta – Haus ohne Männer, as well as Wanda, the Wicked Warden. But still, since it came out before Ilsa 3, we thought maybe it was part of the group. So is it an Ilsa movie or not? Only one way to find out.

*cut to ninety minutes later*

Well, it’s an Ilsa movie in spirit, but since Thorne plays a character named Greta, it isn’t canonical. An enterprising video distributor renamed it to sucker aficionados of the first two Ilsa flicks. We doubt those fans felt tricked—Greta is identical to the other efforts, but without the nazi backstory. It was made under the steady, sleazy hand of veteran smut director Jesús Franco, and plotwise Tania Busselier goes undercover into Thorne’s brutal Las Palomas mental institution/supermax prison in order to expose its corruption, but in risking her body and mind gets far more than she bargained for. And by more we mean whippings, various sexual invasions, and, probably, a sense of dismay about the direction of her film career.

The movie is really just an episodic collection of torture set pieces interspersed with sex scenes, and it’s absolutely awful. There’s no way to get around that fact. It’s ridiculously written and atrociously acted, which we sometimes don’t mind if a film has a certain spark, but this one is like a broken down horse with ticks and saddlesores. It’ll get you somewhere but it won’t be a pleasant ride. Thorne shows everything she’s got, but while her fuzzy nooks and crannies may be a draw for some, we cannot recommend a movie this bad, even for people who think they’re clever enough to make fun of it. Greta – Haus ohne Männer, aka Ilsa the Wicked Warden, aka Wanda, the Wicked Warden premiered in Japan today in 1977. If you’re curious, here are our entries on the actual Ilsa canon—one, two, three.

Japan, West Germany, Greta - Haus ohne Männer, Ilsa the Wicked Warden, Wanda the Wicked Warden, Jesús Franco, Dyanne Thorne, Lina Romay, poster art, cinema, sexploitation, women in prison, nudity, movie review

Vintage Pulp

September 15 2018

MEAT IS MURDER

Sabrina Siani is the queen of hearts. Livers, spleens, and kidneys too.

There are a surprising number of cannibal sexploitation movies out there. La Dea Cannibale is one of the better known entries. It’s an Italian production with Sabrina Siani in the title role as a little girl found by jungle maneaters who grows up to be fine as hell and becomes the queen of the tribe. As per usual in these movies, an expedition to locate her is mounted by cityfolk. These lunch items comprise the father who lost Siani in the first place—along with his arm—accompanied by several witless adventurers. Or maybe it’s fairer to call them brave rather than dumb. But when the group come across stray body parts and gnawed upon corpses yet keep right on trekking into the heart of schlockness, what would you call that? Dumb, right?

Pretty soon the cannibals start picking them off with darts and poisoned arrows, but a few stubborn souls eventually reach the evil village, whereupon daddy is shocked to discover his daughter has grown into a bleached blonde bombshell cavorting in only a thong. The question at that point is whether he can wrench her from the clutches of the godless flesheaters. They won’t give her up easily and you can really understand that—other jungle tribes in 1970s cinema have white girl goddesses so why shouldn’t they? We’d almost recommend this one for laughs if there were a digital transfer out there, but sadly the version we saw looks like the film footage was discovered in a toilet. Sort of like its plot. La Dea Cannibale, which was also called Mondo cannibale, opened in Italy today in 1980.

Italy, La Dea Cannibale, Mondo cannibale, White Cannibal Queen, Jesús Franco, Jess Franco, Sabrina Siani, Lina Romay, poster art, cinema, sexploitation, movie review

Vintage Pulp

April 26 2016

LIFE BEHIND BARBS

Nobody gets out of here alive.

We wrote about Spanish director Jesús Franco not long ago. Sort of. When we noticed another premiere date approaching for one of his films we thought we’d check it out. El reformatorio de las perdidas, originally titled Frauengefängnis, and called Barbed Wire Dolls in the U.S., is a nearly plotless exercise in sadism featuring Lina Ronay, Monica Swinn, and other overheated female convicts dealing with predatory guards and an evil wardeness. There’s an escape, as usual in these Franco films, and as usual it fails. That’s giving nothing away because the escape isn’t the point—the nudity and sex are. Last time we discussed Franco we made a joke of it without really talking about the quality of his films. So here’s the deal—they range from the arty to the ridiculous to the outright terrible. This one falls unambiguously into the latter category. That is all. Hey, but you gotta love that Spanish poster. Frauengefängnis premiered in West Germany today in 1976, and hit Spain and other countries in 1977.

Spain, West Germany, El reformatorio de las perdidas, Frauengefängnis, Barbed Wire Dolls, Jesús Franco, Jess Franco, Lina Romay, Monica Swinn, poster art, cinema, women in prison, sexploitation, movie review, nudity

Vintage Pulp

May 14 2014

EXCLUSIVELY YOURS

It was small but effective.

Exclusive was a digest sized monthly published out of New York City by the appropriately named Digest Publications, Inc. It launched in March 1954, had the usual mix of celebs, scandal, and crime, and folded after two years. This issue has everyone from playboy Shep King to Italian actress (and former Pulp Intl. femme) Silvana Pampanini to showgirl Julie Bryan, as well as an interesting crime photo essay the editors—distastefully—decided to title “Sexclusive.” That’s not a smart choice when referring to sexual assault. But moving on, the good thing about these pocket magazines is the text was large relative to the page size, which means that when scanned the articles are easily readable even on our website. That being the case we won’t bother describing the contents any more than we already have. We’ve scanned about twenty-five pages below if you’re interested, and we’re going in search of a glass of ice-cold white wine. Enjoy.

ABOUT

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PULP INTL.
HISTORY REWIND

The headlines that mattered yesteryear.

October 7

1959—Dark Side of Moon Revealed

The Soviet space probe Luna 3 transmits the first photographs of the far side of the moon. The photos generate great interest, and scientists are surprised to see mountainous terrain, very different from the near side, and only two seas, which the Soviets name Mare Moscovrae (Sea of Moscow) and Mare Desiderii (Sea of Desire).

October 6

1966—LSD Declared Illegal in U.S.

LSD, which was originally synthesized by a Swiss doctor and was later secretly used by the CIA on military personnel, prostitutes, the mentally ill, and members of the general public in a project code named MKULTRA, is designated a controlled substance in the United States.

October 5

1945—Hollywood Black Friday

A six month strike by Hollywood set decorators becomes a riot at the gates of Warner Brothers Studios when strikers and replacement workers clash. The event helps bring about the passage of the Taft-Hartley Act, which, among other things, prohibits unions from contributing to political campaigns and requires union leaders to affirm they are not supporters of the Communist Party.

October 4

1957—Sputnik Circles Earth

The Soviet Union launches the satellite Sputnik I, which becomes the first artificial object to orbit the Earth. It orbits for two months and provides valuable information about the density of the upper atmosphere. It also panics the United States into a space race that eventually culminates in the U.S. moon landing.

October 4

1970—Janis Joplin Overdoses

American blues singer Janis Joplin is found dead on the floor of her motel room in Los Angeles. The cause of death is determined to be an overdose of heroin, possibly combined with the effects of alcohol.