AMAZZONI PRIME

You Donne wanna mess with her.

Above: an alternate poster for the Italian lost world adventure Le Amazzoni – Donne d’amore e di guerra, known in English as Battle of the Amazons. The warrior on this and the previous poster reminds us of Raquel Welch, but she wasn’t in the movie. Instead it featured Lucretia Love, Paolo Tedesco, and Solvi Stubing, which is nothing to complain about. What is worth complaint is that we can’t find out who painted the poster. But we’ll keep digging. Meanwhile you can check out the first poster here, and a fun Japanese poster here. Le Amazzoni – Donne d’amore e di guerra premiered in Italy today in 1973.

The temperature in the Amazon just keeps going up.
This remarkable Japanese poster was made to promote a film called 空手アマゾネス, which was originally released in Italy as Le Amazzoni – Donne d’amore e di guerra, and also known in English as Battle of the Amazons, The 100 Fighting Amazons, and Karate Amazons. It was also known in Japan as Karate Amazones, as you can see by looking at the poster. It starred Lincoln Tate, Paola Tedesco, and Solvi Stubing, and that looks like Tedesco on the art getting some relief from the heat by going shirtless. We talked about this movie long ago. Feel free to have a look here. It was originally released in 1973, and reached Japan today in 1974.
Once upon a rain forest dreary.

From the immortal director Alfonso Brescia, who gave humanity films such as Super Stooges vs. the Wonder Women and Kill Rommel!, comes Le amazzoni – donne d’amore e di guerra, aka Battle of the Amazons. As you’ve no doubt guessed, it’s a sword and sandal epic, shot in Italy and starring an international cast of b-level actors, including Lincoln Tate, Lucretia Love, Paola Tedesco, and Solvi Stubing. In the film, a group of villagers hire some thieves to help defend against a band of Amazons.

You’ve seen this plot before when it was called The Magnificent Seven, or better yet Seven Samurai, but unfortunately, the only magnificent aspects of Amazzoni are the various scantily clad women. These warriors are hot, but also exceedingly mean. They kill their own wounded, torture people in various diabolical ways, and run roughshod over the nearby peasants like a band of neocons, appropriating whatever or whomever they desire.

When the thieves and villagers make their mutual defense pact, we get a little culture clash comic relief to lighten the tone, which is good because the entire film is so dark it looks like it was shot through a pair of welding goggles. Eventually the fun and games end and we’re off to a climactic final battle, the outcome of which we won’t spoil except to say that in a movie with an anti-feminist subtext, things are not likely to end well for queen ballbuster. The above poster was produced for the film’s Italian premiere today in 1973, and you can see the original trailer here.

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HISTORY REWIND

The headlines that mattered yesteryear.

1962—Cuban Missile Crisis Begins

A U-2 spy plane flight over the island of Cuba produces photographs of Soviet nuclear missiles being installed. Though American missiles have been installed near Russia, the U.S. decides that no such weapons will be tolerated in Cuba. The resultant standoff brings the U.S. and the Soviet Union to the brink of war. The crisis finally ends with a secret deal in which the U.S. removes its missiles from Turkey in exchange for the Soviets removing the Cuban weapons.

1970—Angela Davis Arrested

After two months of evading police and federal authorities, Angela Davis is arrested in New York City by the FBI. She had been sought in connection with a kidnapping and murder because one of the guns used in the crime had been bought under her name. But after a trial a jury agreed that owning the weapon did not automatically make her complicit in the crimes.

1978—Sid Vicious Arrested for Murder

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1979—Adams Publishes First Hitchhiker's Book

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, the first of five books in a series, is published by Douglas Adams. The novels follow on the heels of the tremendously successful British television series of the same name.

1976—China Coup Thwarted

The new head of the Chinese Communist Party, Hua Goufeng, snuffs out a coup led by Chairman Mao’s widow Jiang Qing and three other party members. They become known as the Gang of Four, and are tried, found guilty of treason, and receive death sentences that are later commuted to lengthy prison terms.

1987—Loch Ness Expedition Ends

A sonar exploration of Scotland’s Loch Ness, called Operation Deepscan, ends after a week without finding evidence that the legendary Loch Ness Monster exists. While the flotilla of boats had picked up three sonar contacts indicating something large in the waters, these are considered to be detections of salmon schools or possibly seals.

Classic science fiction from James Grazier with uncredited cover art.
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