THREE THE HARD WAY

Hong Kong kidnappers have problems mastering possession, and so do the filmmakers.


If Tarantino likes it, it must be tops. At least that’s the assumption some would make upon learning that 1976’s Ebony, Ivory & Jade, aka She-Devils in Chains, has Tarantino’s stamp of approval. Well, despite the endorsement and status as a minor classic of the blaxploitation genre, the film isn’t great. It has some highlights, including confidently staged action sequences and camerawork that does seem to have influenced Tarantino. But its failings are legion—bad script, wooden acting, and heavy duty crushed black levels that make the actors almost impossible to see in the night sequences. We’ll give a pass on that last problem, because it could have happened during the video or DVD transfer.

We’ll admit though, this flick is damned funny in parts—unintentionally so, foremost the character Stacy’s beatdown of a bad guy who morphs into a dummy at the moment she hoists him overhead and helicopter spins him through a room divider. The basic idea of the film is also appealing—Hong Kong bad guys kidnap five female track stars for ransom, unaware that two of them happen to be martial arts experts that will cause no end of trouble once they untie themselves. Playboy playmate Rosanne Katon in the lead role is also a plus. But as blaxploitation, even a discernibly elevated budget doesn’t lift the film above other entries in the genre.

As a side note, the above promo poster should help put to rest any idea that apostrophe illiteracy has something to do with modern education or the internet or whatever. It has always been a problem, and we see it all the time in vintage material. This particular failure to master the possessive form is pretty egregious, though. Yes, it’s attached to a movie shot in the Philippines, but the error made it all the way through a phalanx of American writers, designers, pre-press workers, printers, and producers working in the U.S. of A. at—or at least for—Lawrence Woolner’s Dimension Pictures. Pretty bad. Though as we’ve noted in the past, sometimes apostrophe placement can be legitimately tricky.

Thunderbirds are go!

We were excited, to say the least, when we found this Imai model of Thunderbird 3 complete with a miniature Alan Tracy, because we remember first seeing this show in syndication during the nineties and it was one of the coolest, if craziest, ideas in television history. If any concept ever pushed willing suspension of disbelief to its limits, it was this one, and we… Sorry, what’s that? You don’t know what we’re talking about? Surely you jest. Thunderbirds was this great British sci-fi television show conceived by Gerry and Sylvia Anderson, and the entire cast consisted of marionettes that, well… Actually we can’t possibly do it justice with words. Let’s just say if you’ve seen Team America: World Police, you’ve seen Thunderbirds. But if that still doesn’t get the concept across, you can check out the opening credit sequence in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1, and GO!

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HISTORY REWIND

The headlines that mattered yesteryear.

1960—Nevil Shute Dies

English novelist Nevil Shute, who wrote the books A Town Like Alice and The Pied Piper, dies in Melbourne, Australia at age sixty-one. Seven of his novels were adapted to film, but his most famous was the cautionary post-nuclear war classic On the Beach.

1967—First Cryonics Patient Frozen

Dr. James Bedford, a University of California psychology professor, becomes the first person to be cryonically preserved with intent of future resuscitation. Bedford had kidney cancer that had metastasized to his lungs and was untreatable. His body was maintained for years by his family before being moved to Alcor Life Extension Foundation in Arizona.

1957—Jack Gilbert Graham Is Executed

Jack Gilbert Graham is executed in Colorado, U.S.A., for killing 44 people by planting a dynamite bomb in a suitcase that was subsequently loaded aboard United Airlines Flight 629. The flight took off from Denver and exploded in mid-air. Graham was executed by means of poison gas in the Colorado State Penitentiary, in Cañon City.

1920—League of Nations Convenes

The League of Nations holds its first meeting, at which it ratifies the Treaty of Versailles, thereby officially ending World War I. At its greatest extent, from 28 September 1934 to 23 February 1935, the League had 58 members. Its final meeting was held in April 1946 in Geneva.

1957—Macmillan Becomes Prime Minister

Harold Macmillan accepts the Queen of England’s invitation to become Prime Minister following the sudden resignation of Sir Anthony Eden. Eden had resigned due to ill health in the wake of the Suez Crisis. Macmillan is remembered for helping negotiate the Nuclear Test Ban Treaty after the Cuban Missile Crisis. He served as PM until 1963.

1923—Autogyro Makes First Flight

Spanish civil engineer and pilot Juan de la Cierva’s autogyro, which was a precursor to the helicopter, makes its first successful flight. De la Cierva’s autogyro made him world famous, and he used his invention to support fascist general Francisco Franco when the Spanish Civil War broke out in July 1936. De la Cierva was dead by December of that same year, perishing, ironically, in a plane crash in Croydon, England.

Italian artist Sandro Symeoni showcases his unique painterly skills on a cover for Peter Cheyney's He Walked in Her Sleep.
French artist Jef de Wulf was both prolific and unique. He painted this cover for René Roques' 1958 novel Secrets.
Christmas themed crime novels are rare, in our experience. Do Not Murder Before Christmas by Jack Iams is an exception, and a good one. The cover art is by Robert Stanley.

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