After watching the 1932 hunter-stalks-humans flick The Most Dangerous Game a few months ago we stumbled across a 1972 variation on the theme titled The Suckers. Both movies, surprisingly, were derived from the same source, a 1924 short story by Richard Connell. The Suckers stars Richard Smedley, Steve Vincent, Laurie Rose (aka Misty Dawn), and Sandy Dempsey, and the aforementioned variation is sex. We knew that going in, and we were thinking, hell, this might be fun—a classic pulp story adapted for the sexploitation-happy ’70s. But we were wrong. It turns out The Suckers had a $30,000 budget—which is infinitesimal even for a grindhouse flick—and the lack of expenditure shows across the entire spectrum of production, from acting, to staging and blocking, to pacing, to screenwriting and more.
In Connell’s short story and the 1932 adaptation the unfortunate guests land on an evil guy’s desolate island because their yacht runs aground. In The Suckers, the guests—who are models, an employee of the modeling agency, and his wife—show up voluntarily after being invited. They’re soon running for their lives after being told by their host that their sole purpose for visiting is to be stalked by professional hunters. Obviously, there comes a point when they realize survival means fighting back. But they seem unlikely to manage that effectively. Why? Did we mention that they’re models? And that the agency guy is a total schlub? Luckily, great white hunter Richard Smedley and his monobrow side with the prospective prey. He’s a lardass but at least he has a rifle. With his help, the fashion plates just might make it back to the Garment District alive.
Even though The Suckers is a sexploitation movie, we expected the ratio of skin to action to be roughly equivalent, but the hunting scenes take up only about twenty minutes, while sex consumes about thirty minutes, a couple of sexual assaults take about ten, and bad dialogue fills out the rest of the running time. Except for one sex scene that manages to get pretty steamy the movie is a waste of all those aforementioned minutes. The film’s main value, to us anyway, is as an example of what we’re referring to whenever we point out that it wasn’t just Japanese studios that explored unsavory themes during this period. The difference is those films were artfully made. The Suckers is just gratuitous and haphazard. Its failure is probably why it was later released as The Woman Hunt—because a certain segment of the male population would see it based on that title alone. Those who did were—you guessed it—suckers.
*sigh* I’m getting mighty fucking bored on this island. Even my best formal wear doesn’t lift my mood anymore.
My God. I suddenly have the most dastardly idea.
And now we shall play a very dangerous game! Staring like cats! We’ll be in danger of enjoying ourselves!
Stand against the wall and I’ll throw this knife at you. I mean—not at you. Close enough to be dangerous. I mean— Okay, I can see you’re not into it.
How about a little Russian roulette? That’s a fairly dangerous game.
Erm… Joel? I think we should flee before he gets to the most dangerous game.
We’re lost aren’t we? I said flee. I didn’t say flee with no goddamn idea which way you were going.
Are you sure we shouldn’t have turned left back there at the bog of doom?
Just admit you’re lost, Joel. And not to add to your worries, but I’m getting pretty hungry. If I’m snippy it’s your fault.
Okay, now we’re just going in circles.
See? He’s found us! You never listen!
Count! Can you hear me? I’ll make you a deal! Take her, and let me leave!
